Two years ago, Elvira’s relationship with her partner broke down. She had previously faced abuse from her ex-husband that caused her to get into debt and lose her flat. She moved in with her then partner but ended up needing to leave as they were regularly fighting. She was being threatened by him and continually criticised.
She contacted her council and was able to move into a women’s hostel run by Rowan Alba, where she has been staying for the past 2 years. When asked about moving in Elvira says she was “very scared, because obviously I wasn’t used to living in this type of environment”. She could not leave her room due to fear. She tiptoed around if she did need to leave her room, as she was worried something would happen. She even got scared when a staff member knocked on her door.
She gradually become more comfortable with the environment and started to participate in the activities available at the Hostel. Elvira was formerly a professional chef and has been cooking for other residents and even taught some of them to cook.
“I like cooking. So sometimes we do cooking activities. I’ve done quite a lot, like pizzas. I’ve done lasagna. I made pasta once, and everyone really devoured it.”
As a result of the challenges she’s encountered, she has a diagnosis of complex-PTSD. She experiences heightened levels of anxiety. When she arrived, she would stay in her room and was regularly having panic attacks triggered by noises such as doors slamming or people shouting outside her window.
She saw a therapist for a short period of time, but did not continue. She did not feel understood, and could not see any progress, so stopped going to see her. She spoke to the staff at the hostel and asked to see a psychologist as she needed to talk through some things.
For the last year, she has been working with Sarah, a clinical psychologist whose work at Rowan Alba’s hostel is funded by St Martin-in-the-Fields Charity’s Mental Health Fund to address this. With support from Sarah and another psychologist, Elvira is starting to be able to face her fears.
She is now feeling confident enough to attend classes to help her manage her anxiety and past trauma. Through these, she has connected with the other women who have had similar experiences to her
Elvira is in a very good place and is working toward moving into an independent place of her own. “Within six months’ time when I get my own place, I’ll use what I’ve learnt here. Hopefully I’ll be more successful this time and .. I’ll be much better with paying my own bills and much better with budgeting and obviously when I feel ready, start going back to full time work…..and just trying to build my life back up, because my life had been destroyed when I lost my own little flat.”
